Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Writing Challenge - Round 4: Results
#1
Yo legends. Round four results thread is now open. Show us what you got using the words brick and bruise.
Reply
#2
They barked and barked,
those horrible dogs.
"Shut up, shut up"
I wish I had clogs.
The barking continues,
I grind my teeth.
"If you don't stop barking,
I'm gonna give you grief.
Bark, bark, bark,
the mutts want trouble.
I turn to my puzzle and count to three,
" Be quiet, just for me"
They did not stop, they refused to stop,
I rush to the door wishing I had a crop.
This time around I idecide
The dogs and me are about to collide.
The flash of light, the stabbing pain,
What was I doing? What was I saying? 
One week later I walk with care. 
The brick and my toe the bruises still bare.
Reply
#3
Alchemy

I wonder when I see the square painted with bloodshed;
if a mason and a rebel could share a common word
like you and I do with wine and unleavened bread?
Layaway bricks for the new to build and the old to hurt.
Leave behind the palace of the Tsaar of stone and gold,
and the bruise where the crown was knocked to the ground.
Step away from the guillotine made of metal and cold,
and the ropes that cut into your hands which were bound.
Both destruction and reconstruction belong to a snake
which consumes it’s own tail in a cycle without end.
The ouroboros of nature puts humanity itself at stake,
unless our very ideals instead we can learn to bend.
Reply
#4
Apologies the delay in reviewing all...I've off with a bad back all week. Get to you all shortly

(06-04-2018, 07:54 AM)beldob Wrote: I wish I had clogs.

Hahaha - that was great. Loved the clogs line.

(06-04-2018, 09:56 AM)Mr. Obvious Wrote: Alchemy


The ouroboros of nature puts humanity itself at stake

Geeze your stuff is deep. I might need you to explain this piece to me. The end seems to be about consuming to the point where we destroy ourselves (consume ourselves), and I loved the ouroboros line. The beginning seems to suggest to me about old lines - old enemies (maybe enemies to strong a word) need to be removed. Get away from the conflicts of the past and find a new way. Make a golden life from the lead (weight) of the past? Or has it gone way over my head?
Reply
#5
Hey, Duff. Sorry I haven't got to this. It's been a busy week for me too. Boo. Hope your back feels better!
Reply
#6
(06-09-2018, 08:39 PM)Duff Moss Wrote: Apologies the delay in reviewing all...I've off with a bad back all week. Get to you all shortly

(06-04-2018, 07:54 AM)beldob Wrote: I wish I had clogs.

Hahaha - that was great. Loved the clogs line.

(06-04-2018, 09:56 AM)Mr. Obvious Wrote: Alchemy


The ouroboros of nature puts humanity itself at stake

Geeze your stuff is deep. I might need you to explain this piece to me. The end seems to be about consuming to the point where we destroy ourselves (consume ourselves), and I loved the ouroboros line. The beginning seems to suggest to me about old lines - old enemies (maybe enemies to strong a word) need to be removed. Get away from the conflicts of the past and find a new way. Make a golden life from the lead (weight) of the past? Or has it gone way over my head?

Thank you Duff. That's kind to say.
It's supposed to be about our seemingly inate inability to live with one another, despite being social creatures. Everyone has their own ideal for the world, some choose to work within the frames to change it. Others seek more drastic and revolutionary ways. But we all keep tugging at it, trying to destroy what we feel doesn't fit and recreate something better in it's place. Nice in theory... But In a sense, we're like rabid dogs fighting endlessly over a bone. Unless we all can learn to compromise.

I'm glad you like my stuff, Duff. Though don't be fooled. It's not all that deep, nor all that on the mark. Big Grin
Reply
#7
Duff, hope your bCk feels better soon.
Reply
#8
@Nathan Andrews submitted in the open challenge thread. Here is his response:


********
Brick by brick I build this wall around me. I build up this facade.

My face shows stone and my words fall heavy.

Behind this wall I am safe. I am protected from the bruises inflicted by my tormentors.

Behind this wall I am shielded from those in whom I would invest my love and care and effort and kindness, only for them to leave me one-by-one.

This wall I build continues to fall. And I build it again and again like Sisyphus rolling the stone up the mountain only to have it roll back down so he could roll it back up again.

This wall of bricks never stands because I've not learned to fill the gaps between with mortar.

I suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune and come out bruised and then build the wall again. Brick-by-brick.

The day I secure the bricks with mortar is the day I choose to end it.
Reply
#9
(06-12-2018, 11:33 PM)Duff Moss Wrote: @Nathan Andrews submitted in the open challenge thread. Here is his response:


********
Brick by brick I build this wall around me. I build up this facade.

My face shows stone and my words fall heavy.

Behind this wall I am safe. I am protected from the bruises inflicted by my tormentors.

Behind this wall I am shielded from those in whom I would invest my love and care and effort and kindness, only for them to leave me one-by-one.

This wall I build continues to fall. And I build it again and again like Sisyphus rolling the stone up the mountain only to have it roll back down so he could roll it back up again.

This wall of bricks never stands because I've not learned to fill the gaps between with mortar.

I suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune and come out bruised and then build the wall again. Brick-by-brick.

The day I secure the bricks with mortar is the day I choose to end it.
Excellent. I can totally relate.
Reply


Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)